Confessions of Chaos

Ramblings and Reflections of a Life Lived in Disarray…

Feelings

by

in

I cry a lot, not necessarily because I am unhappy, although that does happen sometimes,

 but because I am unafraid to feel.

Society often equates crying with weakness.

Expressing feelings in such a way is often considered childish or impulsive, and written off

as some character flaw.

Cry baby, attention whore, pussy.

And maybe that’s true sometimes… maybe.

But here’s why I don’t buy that:

I have survived some difficult life experiences without tears

Rape.

Abuse.

Death.

Just to name a few.

Tears were no comfort to me when my parents divorced.

 Tears were not helpful when my ribs were being broken.

In those moments, my mind decided it would be safer not to feel.

See, that’s where society has it wrong.

Feeling is hard, feeling is painful.

You have to be pretty fuckin brave to allow yourself to feel every chemical reaction in your brain.

Allowing yourself to feel everything in full opens you up to a world that isn’t always easy to understand,

But my God, it’s beautiful!


3 responses to “Feelings”

  1. Christy Lynn Wendt Avatar
    Christy Lynn Wendt

    Very well said! I couldn’t have put it into better words! It was like taking the words right off of a piece of paper that I had written. Inspiring.

    Like

  2. Dustin Kennedy Avatar
    Dustin Kennedy

    I hope your well six months later. Disconnection is painful. I can identify with many things you have mentioned. Its like we get the “supposed to”s at some point in our development, in a way that makes self growth and individuality difficult. I know what its like to have a trusted person flip on you, and have a wonderful visit at the e.r. as a result. If only it were so easy to mend an emotional sound ad you would a bone.

    Like

  3. Dustin Kennedy Avatar
    Dustin Kennedy

    I hope your well six months later. Disconnection is painful. I can identify with many things you have mentioned. Its like we get the “supposed to”s at some point in our development, in a way that makes self growth and individuality difficult. I know what its like to have a trusted person flip on you, and have a wonderful visit at the e.r. as a result. If only it were so easy to mend an emotional sound ad you would a bone.

    Like

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